Should you be here?

Were you looking for proof that unicorns can fly?  Then there's a chance you're lost.

Now, I think you know me well enough to guess that I'm a cancerian with virgo rising.  Oh, OK, you got me - I'm a  leo-cusp-born cancerian.  How did you know? Oh, my hatred of people and superstitious nonsense....  Ha, you've got my number.

My horror-scope from horoscope.com...

"A selfish attitude on your part won't be tolerated today"

Oh, really?  Cos usually it's encouraged...

"Don't make it worse for yourself by pretending that you don't notice others' hurt feelings." 

Worse?  Everyone already thinks I'm selfish.... how is being selfish going to make that worse?

"People are likely to be extra sensitive today"

Is that because that selfish bitch isn't noticing their hurt feelings?

"be careful about trying to impose your will on someone who really wants nothing more than an ear to talk to and a shoulder to cry on."

Oh, jeez, I haven't even written a will, now people want to cry about it?

Well, that was different to EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE.

Still, I'm doing better than aquarius - They're being told "Don't get into the habit of constantly judging the quality or outcome of your work"

... at least I'll still have a job.  Is that selfish??